Schiavonia
| Schiavonia | |
|---|---|
| |
| Flag of Schiavonia | |
| "All Are Friends" | |
| Official Language(s) | English |
| Region | Atlantian Oceania |
| Population | 529 |
| Founded | 194 |
| Capital | New Kingsbury |
| Government - Head of Government - Government Type |
Kenny Sanderson IV Direct democracy |
| Area - Total |
12 km² |
| National Animal | Sloth |
| Currency | Weild |
| Anthem | Viva Schiavonia (Instrumental) |
| ISO Nation Code | SCV |
| Internet TLD | .scv |
| Phone Code | +724806 |
| Currency Code | SVW |
| WA Status | Non-Member |
| Stats: NSEconomy Pipian XML | |
Schiavonia is a mysterious re-emerging island nation in Atlantian Oceania. The original nation was known for sport, hosting World Cup 30, and the laid back and friendly nature of it's people. The climate is like that of the Caribbean, namely hot, but prone to severe storms and hurricanes.
The main language of Schiavonia is English, but a lot of other languages are spoken across the country. Despite the language diversity, the use of English is almost universal, be it as a main or secondary language.
A Quick Guide to Old Schiavonia
This is taken from a mocked-up version of Schiavonia's top selling national newspaper The Schiavone Scribe, posted during World Cup 31. It should be noted that not all of these hold true in the new nation of Schiavonia.
Schiavonia is a collection of forty-six islands in the North-East of region known as The League. Our neareset neighbours geographically are Anastasiania, Collonie, Rejistania and The Garbage Men.^
Our flag contains three horizontal stripes of orange, dark red and orange again, and are in colours known as royal orange and Schiavone red. The stripes represent the colours of the royal family. In the top left of the flag are forty-six yellow crosses on a red background, representing the forty-six islands.^
The word describing something or someone from Schiavonia is Schiavone, not Schiavonian, Schiavoni or anything else. The only acceptable shortened versions are the Schias or the 'Vones.*
The current King of Schiavonia is King Francesco. He is most famous because it was under his reign that football became popular, and so the national stadium is named after him.^
The Schiavone calendar has only existed since the formation of the nation under the monarch King James, and so the current year (as of World Cup 31) is 124. Before that, Schiavonia was a set of independent islands and collonies.
The Schiavone national anthem is entitled 'Viva Schiavonia', and is a mixture of calypso music featuring strings. The instrumental version is usually played at sporting events, although some Schiavone fans like to make their own words up.
Schivone people hold friendliness and honesty as very important characteristics of their personalities. Anyone found to be unfriendly or dishonest will become publicly outcast by the people.
Although Schiavonia's official religion is Catholicism, the government don't really care what religion people are, or even if they have one or not. The naturally relaxed nature of the people means that everyone gets on alright anyway.
Despite being a relatively well advanced nation technologically, there are two areas in which technology hasn't been developed, mainly because there is no need for them to be. Firstly, the only motorised transport in Schiavonia are boats. Travelling across the same island must be done on foot or by bicycle. Secondly, there are no technologically advanced weapons, so if we ever end up in a fight of sorts, it's spears, swords and pointy sticks for us.
Our capital city is Kingsbury. It is home to almost a quarter of all Schiavones.^
Our economy is not the most developed in the world, with the majority of people not particularly well off. However, levels of poverty are low.
Despite being a member, the Schiavone government hold the UN in disregard as they do not trust them. As a result, they like to play tricks on UN officials visiting Schiavonia to confuse them. Hence why many people don't know as much as they might about our nation.^
Despite having an elected government, the leader of the country is the king, who is given an annual vote of confidence.
Schiavonia has a tropical climate, with dry and rainy seasons. Sports are largely played in the dry season. In the rainy season, the most common sports in the country are foreign football and darts.
Despite travelling around the country in boats, most Schiavones can't swim.
Schiavonia is famous for it's music. It is amongst the worst in the world.
In rural areas of Schiavonia, many youngsters can often be seen travelling around on street luges and street bobsleigh. However, this is highly dangerous, and over 2,000 Schiavones are injured a year doing it.^
Two percent of Schiavones are cross-eyed.**
Schiavonia's population is a thousand times less than on the official national description. It is currently almost 24 million.^
According to a popular rumour, Schiavonia is linked to the nation of Druida, who participated in some World Cups a while back. The truth is that we're not anything to do with them. Although a writer of The Schiavone Scribe once wrote for their publication The Daily Druid. However, that was twenty years ago. He's not here any more.
We do like a drink, though.
However, we are linked to the nation of Socialist Romanistan, who participated in this World Cup. They operated out of northern Kingsbury.
Schiavonia's main sporting rivals through history have been with Rejistania, The Islands of Qutar and Northern Caesarea. Two of them are friendly rivalries, but we can't stand the liars of Northern Caesarea as they never apologised and showed ignorance of what the Schiavone nation stands for.
(* - In reality, the relaxed nature of the Schivone people means that unless they are called something insulting, and as long as it is clear that it is something from Schiavonia that is being referred to, they don't mind too much what they are called. They do refer to themselves as Schivone, though.)
(** - This is a lie.)
(^ - These were true at the time the piece was written (Schiavone year 124) but have very little truth in them for the modern country.)
Modern Schiavonia
Schiavonia disappeared off the map for some 50 years after the national football team disappeared during World Cup 37. While it wasn't known what happened to the team, it is thought that they went home to find their homeland, only to find it ravaged by animals. Schiavonia's noteably poor defence and army could not cope with lions and snakes, and so the wildlife took over the islands. Any survivors, including the football team, moved to live all around the world.
In the build up to World Cup 49, in the Schiavone year 194 Carlos Cueto, a former Schiavonia international footballer living in Cafundéu, purchased a small island, and invited members of the nation's World Cup 36 squad and their families to join him. They unanimously accepted, and so a new nation of Schiavonia was born. Cueto became de facto leader of the country, which became home to about 450 people.
Schiavonia came to international prominance in the year 198, when they entered the World Cup 50 qualifying campaign with a team consisting only of children living on the island. While this in itself was not overly outstanding in itself by World Cup standards, the fact that this team ranked just inside the top one hundred in the world (97th) went on to the quarter finals was nothing short of astonishing. However, as the campaign got more and more exciting, it became too much for some of the older generation, including Carlos Cueto, who passed away along with his friend and head of the Schiavone Football Federation David Jones in hospital in Krytenia.
